Queens Park Rangers F.C. ~ Harry Redsnapper

Introduction: Henry James “Harry” Redknapp (born 2 March 1947) is a former English kickballer who is currently manager of Queens Park Rangers. He has had a long career in football management starting in 1983 with Bournemouth.

He is also known for his colourful quotes. “I sorted out the team formation last night lying in bed with the wife. When your husband’s as ugly as me, you’d only want to talk football in bed.”

Preparation time: 30mins

Cooking time: 4 or 20 mins depending if you choose whole fish or fillets

Home kit: Baking tray, small mixing bowl and dish, rolling pin (or hammer) .

Away kit: 4 plates, knives and forks

Serves: 4

Ingredients

• 1 pound whole Harry Redsnapper, cleaned and gutted OR fillets
• For the marinade:
• 2 cloves garlic
• 2 stalks fresh lemongrass, cut in 1/4″ stalks
• 1 Tablespoon fish sauce
• 1 teaspoon brown sugar
• 3 Tablespoons peanut oil
• 2 Thai chillies, sliced thinly

Method: Preheat the grill

First half

Wash the fish and pat dry with some paper towels. If you’re using the whole fish, make two or three ¼” deep cuts diagonally across its flanks. Smash up the stalks of the lemongrass with the rolling pin (or hammer) but reserve about a 1″ of the softest stalk and chop finely. Combine the garlic, fish sauce, sugar, oil, chillies, smashed and chopped lemongrass in the bowl and let the it marinade for about 5 minutes, then remove the chillies and set aside in the dish for later use.

Pour the marinade over the fish. If you are using the whole fish, place the smashed lemongrass stalks in the body cavity of the fish. This will add some extra lemongrassiness. Let marinade for about 20 minutes.

Second half

Place fish under the hot grill. Cook for about 2 minutes on each side for fillets, 10 minutes on each side for the whole fish. The time necessary for a whole Harry Redsnapper will also depend on the size of him.

Full time results

Remove fish from grill and dress with the diced chillies and serve on the plates you warmed under the grill with sticky Thai rice. Once served and eaten, wait for a couple of hours and you will find that Fabio Cappello has resigned from whatever job he was in.

Queens Park Rangers F.C. ~ Queens Pork Bangers with Terry Vegetables

Introduction: Queens Park Rangers Football Club were founded in 1886 after the merger of Christchurch Rangers and St. Judes Institute. Their traditional colours are blue and white. In the early years after the club’s formation in their original home of Queen’s Park, games were played at many different grounds until finally the club settled into their current location at Loftus Road. Owing to their proximity to other west London clubs, QPR maintain long-standing rivalries with several other clubs in the area. The most notable of these are Chelsea, Fulham and Brentford, with whom they contest what are known as West London Derbies.

The stylish pre-2008 badge

Terence Frederick “Terry” Venables (born 6 January 1943 in Dagenham), often referred to as “El Tel”, is an English former football player and manager, as well as being a media pundit. During the 1960s and 70s, he played for various clubs including Chelsea, Tottenham Hotspur and Queens Park Rangers, and gained two caps for England and he managed Queens Park Rangers as well as being a director of the club.

El Tel has also co-authored four novels with writer Gordon Williams and is the co-creator of the ITV detective series Hazell, about a fictional private detective named James Hazell.

Preparation time: 10mins

Cooking time: 30ish mins

Home kit: large frying pan, large saucepan, medium saucepan and a colander (it’s the bowl with holes in it)

Away kit: 4 warmed plates, knives and forks

Serves: 4

Ingredients

• ½ tbsp. vegetable oil
• 8 good-quality pork sausages
• 900g (2lb) Désirée potatoes, cut into chunks
• 40g (1½oz) butter
• 1 large leek, thinly sliced
• 3tbsp milk
• 1tbsp wholegrain mustard
• 4tbsp red onion marmalade

Method: Preheat the oven to 90^oC and put in the plates

First half

Heat the oil in the large frying pan and quickly brown the sausages over a high heat, turning often. Turn the heat down to its lowest setting and leave to cook gently for 20 to 30 minutes until cooked through, turning every so often.

While you keep an eye on them, put the potatoes into the large pan with salted water, cover, bring to the boil, then reduce the heat and simmer for 15-20min until tender. Shove them in the colander and leave to steam dry for a couple of minutes – this stops your mash turning watery.

Second half

Now concentrate here; in the medium saucepan melt half the butter and fry the leek over a gentle heat, covered, for about 25mins until softened.

Melt the remaining butter in the now empty potato pan and add the milk. Add the potatoes and mash until creamy. Stir in the leek and mustard.

Full time results

Slop the mashed spuds onto the warmed plates, I  like to stick the sausages into the mash and spoon on the red onion marmalade.

[There are not too many Terry Vegetables I hope you agree.]

Queens Park Rangers F.C. ~ Cherry Flancis

Introduction: Gerald Charles James “Gerry” Francis (born 6 December 1951) is an English former footballer and manager.

Francis made his debut for Queens Park Rangers v Liverpool in March 1969. He was captain and central midfield player during the 1970s and was a key player in the QPR side which came within a hair’s breadth of their first-ever league title in 1976. He won 12 caps for the England team between 1974 and 1976, and was captain for eight of those matches.

Preparation time: 40mins

Cooking time: 40 mins

Home kit: large and small mixing bowls, large pie dish

Away kit: 4-6 plates and spoons

Serves: 4-6

Ingredients

• ¾ lb. black cherries, washed and stems removed (leave the stones in)
• ½ cup sugar
• 1 tbsp. butter
• ¾ cup flour, sifted
• 1 pinch salt
• 2 eggs, beaten
• 1 cup milk
• Caster sugar

Method: Preheat the oven to 180^oC

First half

Put the cherries in a bowl, sprinkle with ¼ cup of the sugar, and let marinate for 30 minutes. Butter a deep pie dish. Put the flour, salt and remaining ¼ cup sugar in the large bowl. Add the eggs and mix in followed by the milk and another thorough mixing.

Second half

Put the cherries in the pie pan and pour in the batter. Stick it in the oven and bake for 35-40 minutes or until golden. Dust with the caster sugar.

Full time results

Allow to cook, stick on plate, eat

Note: The traditional method is to not pit the cherries. Leaving the stones in keeps the cherries very juicy. However, you can de-pit them if you so desire. But if you do leave them in, be sure to let your guests know before eating. Unless they support Chelsea, Fulham and Brentford.